Closing Time by Semisonic. I’m not sure I ever really understood what the song was about, but there was that one line in the song that I always thought was amazing and to this day regret that I didn’t select it as my senior quote in my high school year book. If you don’t remember it goes something like this…”Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.” I think at this moment in my life this simple phrase resonates greatly.
The new beginning is easy, we are moving to Israel so that Adam can do great math with some of the best number theorists in the world. The other beginning’s end is also easy. As of Sunday, we are no longer residents of our apartment. It was an exhausting process, but we moved everything out either into a storage unit or into a parental home. Almost all of it fit in the storage unit, which justifies all the hours of Tetris that Adam and I played growing up. It is amazing how much of your life you can squeeze into a room that is 10 feet x 15 feet.
As we enter our nomadic life, wandering from homes of parents, grandparents, etc, I officially ended my employment yesterday at Southington High School. I know that the letter of resignation should have been the official moment, but yesterday felt more so as I turned in my keys and as I held back tears saying goodbye to all my colleagues. These are the moments when you realize how lucky you have been. To quote another great song, Big Yellow Taxi, “You don’t know what you’ve got ’til it’s gone.”
So now I am unemployed and living with my parents as Adam begins his one week visit to Israel to prepare for our arrival at the end of the month. I miss him greatly and am thankful to be home with my parents. Without work to keep me occupied, this separation would be a lot more difficult if my parents weren’t around to keep me from moping.
One last thought; people keep wondering why I am not overflowing with excitement for this move. While I know that it our time in Israel will be great and that we will learn a lot more about ourselves and our relationship, the reason that this is so hard is because we have been very happy the last 5 years. It is much easier to pick up and leave when you don’t feel like you have any compelling reason to stay. That isn’t the case for us. I can think of many compelling reasons to stay: a great family, an awesome group of friends, good colleagues, a wonderful community at Beth David, and a comfortable home in West Hartford. It is hard to give up what already feels like happiness for an unknown. I know deep down that we will be happy during the next two years; it is just hard to go through one beginning at the expense of another.
So now our plan is in motion. So far, despite the physical and emotional exhaustion, it has gone as planned. Now we spend time with friends and family before the final part of the plan is initiated on September 23rd.
Until next time,